I just finished reading ‘Raising Grateful Kids In An Entitled World’ the other day and it was just so good! I’ll do a little review early next week but for now I wanted to share my little ‘aha moment’ I had.
Two days ago my son came off the school bus and I could tell he was upset about something. He usually isn’t super emotional at school and he rarely has issues with other students. Long story short I asked what happened and apparently he fell off the playscape at recess and landed pretty hard on something. He was hurt and began to cry at recess in front of other students. Two little girls in his grade, instead of maybe checking on him or telling an aide, decided to point at him and laugh. I’m pretty sure he was more upset at the laughing part than the actual injury at this point. I’m not one of those parents that calls the teacher every time a kids a jerk, I mean kids can be jerks. My husband and I usually talk things through with the kids and want them to learn how to handle & respond to different situations. (Not saying we wouldn’t call the school or teacher if the issue was big enough to warrant it)
At this point I did something I rarely do, I said “I bet a milkshake would make it feel a little better, just you and me.” He of course said yes and got his shoes back on to go. As we are about to leave my oldest asks where we’re going. I explain your brother had a bad day and is a little upset, so I’m taking him for a treat. She immediately started with ‘it’s not fair’ and ‘you didn’t do that for me last time I was upset.’ I got angry and explained how we do things for her all the time that we don’t do for the others but at that point she stormed off. So the two of us got in the car and chatted our way to McDonald’s. It’s in those one on one moments that my kids personalities really shine through and they are just themselves instead of 1 of 3 fighting for attention whichever way they can get it. And when he isn’t trying to taunt his sisters, he’s a pretty amazing little person.
When we got to the drive thru I’ll be honest, this mommy struggled! Should I bring something back for all 3 kids? Is it unfair if I don’t? Do I really want to deal with complaining when I get home if I don’t? AND there it hit me! I’m the first one to tell my kids ‘DO not say it’s not fair’, ‘life isn’t fair’, ‘you don’t just get something because you want it or someone else has it!’ So as hard as that moment was we still drove away with one free coffee for me (McDonald’s app thank you) and one medium sized strawberry milkshake for my little guy. Nothing else.
When we pulled in the driveway my daughter was outside riding her skateboard and I got out of the car ready to hear it. But the first thing she did when I walked passed her was not at all what I had expected. ” I’m sorry mommy.” 💖